Are you a leader of a Post Zombie Apocalypse Compound/Fort/Base or group? If you are then I have a pivotal tool for you. It started out as a joke but morphed in a The “Commanders Apocalyptic Listing of Living Survivors” or C.A.L.L.S for short. A comprehensive Post Apocalyptic Leadership Guide. We always hear a lot about “prepping for the apocalypse.” This usually brings to mind stockpiles, weapons, transportation and other such tenants of “Survivor Lore.” What hasn’t been addressed is the perspective of a “leader” during the Zombie Apocalypse. Weather you were chosen, thrown in, appointed or self - appointed to your position. One thing is certain you’re going to have to deal with broad spectrum of people. With little or no choice in the matter as the goal is to survive against the living dead. So if you’re ready to answer The C.A.L.L.S, I present you with:
The Commanders Apocalyptic Listing of Living Survivors:
1. The Political Survivor - A "Political Survivor" is no different than a modern day "Politician." They will let you do all the work build the shelter, set up the barricade and stock the food. Then they will come along when the hard work is complete and tell you how they should be the leader. They are exceptionally skilled talkers and will plant the seeds of disharmony in your camp before telling you they were only “trying to help” and that “only they can get you out of this.” It’s like having a snake doing your negotiating for you. “The Political Survivor” believes in the benefits of hard work your hard work. These folks are just like what their namesake implies “Political.“ They use drawn out and convoluted processes to make even them simplest decisions seem complex. While they are focused on controlling the masses wielding power and influence. The dead however will keep coming as a truly unified force with one goal. When it comes to your “Political Survivor” they are better at asking questions than they are at answering them. Most importantly when things fail under their rule as the always will. They go into “blame mode” and in case you’re wondering it will never be their fault. This survivor can stay only if you put them in their place immediately. This “Survivor Type” will complicate the Zombie Apocalypse as they have complicated the current state of the world.
2. The Psycho Survivor - This person is usually a guy and was either "nutty as a fruit cake" before the zombie apocalypse or is using the dead walking as an excuse to do all the deviant things he wanted to do in life. It does not matter how they came to be “psychotic.“ Weather they were this way before the outbreak or they have snapped from the pressure of the crisis. A “Psycho Survivor” is simply going to wreak havoc in this new world until he or she dies or is killed. All they are concerned with is what their disjointed thought process can conceive and that’s not good for you or your people. There is no difference between “giving in” and “giving up” when the dead rise. The problem with having a "Psycho Survivor" in you midst is they are more dangerous than the zombies these guys or gals are as likely to harm you or others as they are to effectively kill the dead. They aren’t concerned with survival tactics or fortifications. In their sick mind they could see the hordes of zombies as worshipers or pink elephants who knows. You have more than enough to deal with trying to survive another day and what you don’t need is someone completely unhinged and out of control. There is no reasoning with a “Psycho Survivor” no logic, no treatment you can give. This survivor has to be dealt with in a more permanent manner because letting them go could even be lethal. Most “Psychotics” aren’t just going to wander away and leave you alone and letting them stay is not an option in your “hideout.” You could sooner control fire than you could these folks
3. The Catatonic Survivor - The stress and the strain of the dead rising to consume the living and losing family and friends. Has driven this person to the edge of shock and there is no real way to tell if they are every coming back. Unlike other “Mentally Strained” survivors this type poses no direct danger to you and your group. You will do what you can and have others attempt to help “The Catatonic Survivor” because you have other pressing matters to contend with. No one said fighting off the living dead would be easy and while everyone deals with stress differently. This person has shut down completely and totally. It is possible with given time and training you could treat this person. In the initial stages of the outbreak there won’t be time for this type of compassion. Maybe in the later stages after you are setup and barricaded in but there is a problem here. That is your more likely to see a “Catatonic Survivor Type” during the chaotic events of the initial outbreak. Meanwhile you’re wasting time and valuable supplies trying to get this person to come around. Here is maybe your first moral test of the Zombie Apocalypse. Do you leave this person and shed the anchor or do you do the right thing and help them. Which puts you and your fellow survivors at risk? With this survivor type let your conscious be your guide. Because leaving your humanity behind is exactly what the zombies have done.
4. The Going Out With A Bang Survivor - This survivor type is almost always a guy as well. For some odd reason realizing the end is near. This survivor only wants to party, have sex and get loaded. This guy is very dangerous any female with in arms reach is at risk hell in some cases any guy too! The danger with this survivor type is that they aren’t interested in fortifying the bunker or stockpiling supplies just partying. Most importantly he is usually loud ad as hell. This during the Zombie Apocalypse is most times a fatal and avoidable mistake. They have no desire to do anything constructive nor do they give a shit about you trying to survive. The will exhibit self destructive behaviors towards themselves and others. While you might not want to die their actions will always put you in a position where you’re worse off than you were. This survivor type has to go! If they want to meet the “Grim Reaper” so bad help them arrange the meeting. Before they schedule a group meeting with “Death” but not theirs yours and your groups meeting that is.
5. The Accidental Survivor - In the "Accidental Survivors" life things have always lent themselves to chance. Everyone knows someone who's "accidentally" lucky or unlucky. Instead of being born with a “Silver Spoon” in their mouths they were born with a “Horseshoe up their ass.” Somehow this person was in a bunker or surrounded by police or sleeping through the whole thing. They say that “chance favors the prepared” but in their case it favors “the inept.” Finally when they come to terms they’ve lucked up on your little well stocked, fortified hideout. This “survivor type” is nice to have around because sometimes this dumb luck comes in handy and they are usually likeable enough folks. You’ll need competent willing hands to help and everyone can’t be leader. Keep this “Survivor Type” around for sure. Just keep them away from anything dangerous. Because as Magneto said “In chess the pawns go first.”
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