10 things you never knew about zombies

10. Zombies have no problem with the rampant obesity or fat people. If I'm not mistaken they prefer us that way.

9. Zombies don't care about race, religion, politics or gender. They want us all to be one of them anyway.

8. Zombies who eat lawyers have been known to get sick to their stomach.

7. Zombies main source of food is stupid people. They like to catch people who are "tweeting."

6. Zombies secretly laugh at werewolves because they have fleas. Plus the crap in the woods and don't wipe.

5. Zombies like people who yell and make noise. Zombies are quiet you should be too.

4. Zombies always poop in their clothes and walk around in their own filth. They don't believe in personal hygiene. They stink!

3. Zombies don't plan things they hate plans. They believe no one should have plans for survival.

2. Zombies are like the IRS they never give up! They hound you come to your door and want more than their fair share.

1. Zombies hate vampires. They feel that vampires are self righteous emo punks. They laugh when vampires get all glittery!